A new competition reality TV show just premiered on TBS called King of the Nerds. According to the opening of the show, "not only is being a nerd suddenly cool, but now nerds run the world." The winner of the competition will win $100,000, be crowned the "King of the Nerds," and be able to sit atop the "Throne of Games." (Now, that's original. *wink*) The hosts of the show are Curtis Armstrong and Bobby Carradine, who were in the original 1984 movie, Revenge of the Nerds. Very apropos.
The most entertaining thing about this new television show is what comes out of the contestants' mouths. They are hilarious. I don't know if it's just the nature of being a nerd. Well, yes, I do. It is the nature of being a nerd. There's something about the way they talk and the things they talk about that make them very quotable. Some of them are very intelligent, with advanced college degrees in mathematics, physics, engineering, or computer science, and others are comic book or gaming fanatics (I'm not saying they're not intelligent, I'm just saying that not all nerds are intelligent - they're just fanatics about certain things). It's a very interesting combination. Some quotes are from actual conversations, and others are from the typical reality TV confessionals.
Quotes:
Alana: I used my power of the dark side.
Ivan: Hey world, guess what? I'm a nerd, and that's awesome! I am awesome!
Genevieve: I would use the $100,000 prize for something fun, like investing in a good Index Fund.
Curtis: For today's "nerd war," you will divide yourselves into two teams of five nerds each. However, as you've noticed, there are 11 of you, which mean somebody doesn't get picked.
Ivan (to himself): Dodgeball.
Genevieve: I'm a Batman fanatic. People tend to describe me as innocent and demure. And then they get to know me and then they start describing me with words like "Machiavellian" and "ruthless."
Brandon: The house is awesome! There's a Radio Shack lab with a white board. I need a white board to survive. Where else you gonna write stuff? A piece of paper's not good for that. Well, I mean it is, but it's not optimal.
Jon: I read text books for pleasure.
Hendrik: I study the mechanical behavior of rocks, ice, and mixtures thereof.
Joshua: I have a zombie plan. Any person who has a zombie plan you know is organized and well thought out.
Genevieve: For the nerd wars, I'm in charge of picking the first person on my team. I'm looking for people who are intelligent, but an added bonus, if they resemble Batman or anybody from the Batman series.
Alana: I want to be on Genevieve's team because she loves Batman and I love Batman.
Virgil: I mean, in terms of, like, my credentials on paper - I mean, I'm aware I look very good on paper. But no one has seen me on paper.
Alana: I'm really good at chess, Batman trivia, knowledge of different gods, like Norse and... and uh... and uh... yea, all those.
Alana: For the rest of the team here, all I have is Batman and being super prepared.
Ivan: This is gonna be really rough because every nerd is so nerdy. We're all nerds!
Curtis: Let's do "rock, paper, scissors" to see who goes first.
Ivan: I thought it was gonna come to this.
Danielle: I don't really feel in danger about being on a team. I am a genius.
Virgil: Picking Celeste was obvious. I mean, have you seen a pro-gamer play? It's ridiculous. Watch one. Like, it's not human.
Hendrik: Celeste picked me by dumping a mixture of what must have been corn starch and water and blue dye over my head, signifying that I was to join the team.
Bobby: So, Hendrik, what is your strategy?
Hendrik: I'm looking for good company.
Bobby: Choose wisely, Hendrik.
Brandon: I am getting worried. It's the nightmare of my elementary school self.
Virgil: I was annoyed. I'm a smart guy. This is obvious to anyone who looks at the facts.
Brandon: What is dead may never die.
Virgil: I thought it was a little surprising that Brandon was picked before I was. I mean, I don't know, it wasn't a crazy decision. I mean, I consider it a margin of error decision.
Side note: I'm not an expert of "margin of error," but I don't think that is the right term to use when picking team members. "I do not think it means what [he thinks] it means." Anyone an expert on "margin of error" that knows?
Curtis: There is nothing nerdier than not getting picked.
Virgil: I think Alana was straight up mistaken. I independently assessed both of these teams, and I come to an opposite conclusion.
Danielle: Lok 'tar ogar! That means "victory or death" in Orcish.
Alana: I was the losiest winner. The losiest loser. The losiest loser.
Ivan: We don't really want to hate each other. We just have to.
Joshua: Captain's Log: Strange location. Adapting well. Good company. Okay with it.
Genevieve: What concerns me about Jon is he's a smoker. How smart is somebody if they choose to smoke and endanger their health?
Hendrik: It's not really whether the universe has a finite or an infinite size. If the universe is infinite, that means that other versions of ourselves are out there in some other worlds. The implications to that are startling. You and I and everyone else on this planet has already won King of the Nerds.
Nerds also wear interesting, and sometimes very funny, T-shirts:
"Nerd"
"Science"
"So Geek So Chic"
"Your Zombie Survival Plan Will Fail"
Batman logo in a purple heart
"Undead"
"College"
"Talk Nerdy to Me"
Regular Batman logo
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