Buffy the Vampire Slayer: season 3, ep. 4 Quippy Quotes

After the surprise ending in episode 3, episode 4, "Beauty and the Beasts" had a lot to deliver. And it doesn't disappoint. It's a great episode. There are a lot of beasts in Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and this episode gives us three. And each one has someone who loves them, in spite of their "beastliness." But which of those beasts is the one terrorizing Sunnydale this time?

One of the best parts of this episode is one little prop. When Willow goes to the morgue to see if any of the bodies were mauled by a werewolf, she carries her "tools" in a Scooby Doo lunch box. Priceless.

Quotes:

Xander: Private Harris reporting for Oz watch.

Xander: Call of the Wild. Aren't we reading the Cliffsnotes for this for English.
Willow: Some of us are.

Scott: Hey, Buffy. That's what I stopped you for, basically. Hey.
Buffy: Okay. Hey.

Oz: Howdy, Debbie.
Debbie: Hi, Oz. Hey, you're not doing jazz band this year?
Oz: Oh, can't take the pressure. It's not the music that's hard, it's the marching.
Buffy: We have a marching jazz band?
Oz: Yea, but since the best jazz is improvisational, we'd be going off in all directions, banging into floats. Scary.
Willow: He's just being Oz.
Oz: Pretty much full-time.

Buffy: Those are pretty flowers.
Debbie: Thanks. Pete brought them for me.
Pete: Yea. Well, I'm sure Scott does that type of stuff for you too, Buffy.
Scott: Well, we're not up to flowers. Are we? Up to flowers? Did I miss flowers?
Buffy: No. We're pre-posy. Definitely.

Giles: No need to panic.
Oz: Just a thought - poker, not your game.

Buffy: Buffy Summers, reporting for sanity.

Mr. Platt: Look, Buffy. Any person - grownup, shrink, pope - any person who claims to be totally sane is either lying or not very bright. I mean, everyone has problems. Everybody has demons, right?
Buffy: Gotta say I'm with you on that.

Giles: We could ask Faith to watch over him.
Oz: What, you're having a slayer watch me? Good, we're not overreacting.

Xander: We're doing crime here. You don't sneak up during crime.

Xander: Too much excitement for the Wilster here.

Buffy: What if... I told you that I had a dream about Angel, and um, it brought up some questions?
Giles: I'd say it was to be expected. Must have been some dream. I didn't know you knew what a card index was for.
Buffy: I dreamt that he came back.
Giles: Of course. After Jenny was killed, I had dreams that she was still alive, that I saved her.
Buffy: This was vivid. Really vivid. Three dimensional. Sensurround, the hills are alive.

Scott: Hey, uh, I can't... I can't back you on that lunch. Nutritional demerits.

Buffy (re: Mr. Platt): He definitely marches to the beat of his own drummer. Actually, I think he makes his own drums.

Oz: I may be a cold-blooded jelly donut, but my timing's impeccable.

Oz: Time's up. Rules change.

Cordelia: Where have I been?
Xander: In your special place, Cor, which is why I adore you.

Cordelia: Great, now I'm going to be stuck with serious thoughts all day.